


When He Saw Her...

by rooknumber13 (damedechance)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Drabbles, F/M, kakasaku - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 02:10:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 20,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7415182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damedechance/pseuds/rooknumber13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of drabbles that kind of progress into a storyline. Mainly romance and lots of shipping. The progression of a love affair between Kakashi and Sakura shown as snippets through time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ...as a nuisance

**Author's Note:**

> I challenged myself to see if I could show where the switch from teammates... to friends... to lovers might occur between Kakashi and Sakura. It is very lazy, but also very fun for my kakasaku heart.

He wasn’t supposed to feel safe. He wasn’t supposed to be sitting there, calmly regarding the ghosts of his past as if they were old friends. But in fact, they were. Rin and Obito were his best friends. It was only natural for him to be happy to see them. Minato-sensei was there, as well, and that made him especially happy. The whole team was together again.

He wasn’t supposed to feel safe, but he did. He felt happy, too.

Kakashi was seated back at the old training grounds where he had first met his team. The sun was bright and warm as it came down softly upon the team of shinobi. The light was so beautiful that it seemed to make the grass shiver and the air shimmer. Wildflowers were interspersed throughout the vast expanse of the field, interrupted only by the occasional rock or twig and, in the middle, the three large stumps that most up and coming genin used for target practice. Kakashi looked at them fondly, remembering Minato-sensei’s threat of tying them up on those stumps if they didn’t get the set of bells from him. That was when they first came together as a team, and now they were all seated next to those stumps, sprawled out in the grass and wildflowers, talking and laughing as if nothing was wrong.

And really, what was wrong? Kakashi tried to remember, but he couldn’t—not for the life of him—pinpoint anything out of place. Rin and Obito were chatting in the usual manner; Obito tried to flirt and when he failed miserably, Rin would laugh and say something sweet. Minato-sensei would occasionally interrupt to make a joke at Obito’s expense, but for the remainder of the time he sat and observed with a fond eye. Kakashi didn’t have the heart in him to interrupt the proceedings; the scene was just too perfect.

Then—right in the middle of Rin’s giggling—Obito glanced over at Kakashi with a gigantic grin and cocked his head to the side. “Kakashi, you look different.”

This comment prompted both Rin and Minato-sensei to turn their attention to Kakashi. Upon focusing their stares, they both began to frown. Upset that the cheerful atmosphere had left, Kakashi looked down at his self and came to a sharp realization:

He was the thing that was out of place.

Kakashi hadn’t noticed it before, but he was wearing his jounin uniform instead of the blue jumpsuit he wore as a kid. Panicking, Kakashi patted his clothes for any further disturbances and found that his arms and legs were much longer than they should have been. Obito and Rin were still just teenagers, so why was Kakashi an adult? He was nearly older than Minato-sensei, for crying out loud! He shouldn’t have been there, it was wrong. Obito, Rin, and Minato-sensei could be enjoying themselves, but Kakashi didn’t have any right! He was intruding, making mistakes, he was…

The sun suddenly became brighter, increasing in heat until Kakashi felt like he would _melt_. Instead, it was the earth that began to melt and morph all around the shinobi team so rapidly that Kakashi could hardly keep up. He struggled to stand with the earth changing beneath his feet, but the rest of the team didn’t seem to have a problem as they simply stood and gazed at him inquisitively. Desperate to return to them, Kakashi looked down at his feet to see what the matter was when he heard a disgusting cry of pain.

“Kakashi!”

And with that shriek from Rin, the earth stopped moving and Kakashi was finally able to stand up and run to his team. What he saw there paralyzed him. All around them was a dark cave and in the center was a giant boulder.

“Kakashi…” Obito said from underneath the rock that was crushing his right side. “Protect Rin.”

Kakashi was torn between wanting to vomit and scream as he stared in horror at his best friend’s trembling form. Blood was pooling out from the side of his body that was hidden underneath the mass of the rock. How Obito could stay so calm, reaching out and speaking so softly around the blood running from the side of his mouth, Kakashi had no idea. The man’s heart went into overdrive as he witnessed his best friend slowly dying, and he fell to his knees clutching his chest to try and calm it. But it was no use, and to make matters worse the entire earth was twisting and turning again, morphing into something else. 

“Please, Obito,” Kakashi choked out. “Don’t go now.”

As numerous rocks fell from the cave above the team, Kakashi’s eyes were focused only on Obito before his entire body was obscured by rock. Softly, yet powerfully enough to be heard over the crumbling earth, Obito murmured around a smile, “Protect Rin, Kakashi.”

“I will!” Kakashi promised as rocks began to fall around Obito’s face. Not wanting to witness his friend’s disappearance, Kakashi closed his eyes tightly and dug his nails into the dirt underneath him.

The earth continued to shake and sputter for a few seconds more until it finally stilled, but Kakashi was still quivering on his knees with his eyes shut. He remained like that until he felt a soft touch on his shoulder. Slowly, Kakashi turned toward the touch and opened his eyes only to find Rin before him and Minato-sensei a few steps behind her. Not only that, but Kakashi found that his eyesight was much clearer and that each minute movement was extremely detailed and profound. Nothing could escape his eye, and Kakashi immediately, inexplicably, placed that as the fault of Obito’s sharingan.

“Rin. Sensei, why didn’t you save Obito?” Kakashi panted desperately as he observed the dark field. His teammates and he were directly in the middle of it, with presumably enemy ninja surrounding the perimeter. “Where are we? Who are they?”

Minato-sensei looked down at Kakashi sadly. “You’ll have to kill them, Kakashi. I can’t help you here.”

Shakily, Kakashi got up from the ground with Rin’s help and glanced between both of his teammates. His eyes were wild and panicked, trying to take everything in and not get overwhelmed by all of the new information. Croaking, Kakashi asked, “What do you mean, Sensei? Why can’t you help me? I need you!”

Frowning, Minato looked away from his student and toward the enemy shinobi surrounding them. He sighed as he observed the danger before looking back to Kakashi. “You have to keep your promise to Obito.”

Startled, for he thought that his moment with Obito hadn’t been witnessed by anyone, Kakashi looked over to see how Rin was holding up. However, Kakashi was only petrified to find that Rin had been replaced with one of the grizzly shinobi that was surrounding them. Despite being so drained from everything he had seen, Kakashi was still a ninja and acted quickly; he charged up Raikiri in his right fist before plunging it deep into the shinobi’s chest. The abruptness of the jutsu and the sharp burst of adrenaline left him panting as he observed his enemy’s life slowly leave his eyes. Then, Kakashi watched his enemy slowly began to shimmer and morph into something else, shrinking in form and features softening. Horrified, Kakashi let out a sharp cry as Rin’s face was revealed before him.

“Kakashi,” Rin whispered desperately as her trembling hands reached up to grab the arm that was impaling her. 

_No_ , Kakashi thought desperately as his new eyes took in every detail with appalling accuracy. His arm was buried up to the elbow in Rin’s chest, and his hand was hanging limply out her back with blood dripping from his fingertips. Blood also seeped out around the wound Kakashi had left and around Rin’s mouth, startling in its vibrant hue. Rin’s whimpers were stained with it.

“Please,” Kakashi cried. “Don’t leave.”

So raptured was he by the awful scene before him that Kakashi didn’t even notice when Minato-sensei called out to him, or when the enemy shinobi shifted into a group of Konoha’s best ninja. The distressed man was unaware when the dark field became illuminated by numerous fires and the red moon. It cast everything in a terrible, bloody glow. Even as Rin began to close her eyes, Kakashi’s best friend dying again at his hand, her face was stained by the red light all around them. Kakashi couldn’t even tell if it was blood or light on Rin’s gentle face anymore.

The only thing that broke through Kakashi’s awareness was the guttural growl coming from behind him. Shocked, Kakashi twisted his head around to find the orange Kyuubi fox, chained and leaning over Minato-sensei and his wife, Kushina. As he looked, Rin disappeared from around Kakashi’s arm. The loss frightened him, but Kakashi was determined not to lose another one of his teammates. Finding strength in his resolve, the man ran towards his sensei with blood still dripping from his arm. Kakashi had to push his way through a crowd of his comrades, but Minato-sensei never seemed to get any closer. 

Suddenly, Kakashi saw that Minato and his wife were preparing for a jutsu over the form of their newborn son. He got a strange sense of foreboding in the chakra surrounding the couple and began to run faster, but the fox’s growls only got louder and the chakra only got brighter until Kakashi was blinded and left paralyzed. 

The light dissipated as fast as it had appeared, and Kakashi found that he was once again standing in the fields of the training ground with the sun shining brightly above. The wind was soft and gentle, rustling against the trees’ branches. The wildflowers gently swayed with the breeze, interrupted only by rocks and twigs and grass and the tree stumps and the bloody bodies of Kakashi’s three fallen teammates.

It was then that Kakashi woke up, jerking away from his bed and clutching his sheets to find something tangible. He was left panting and sweating as the light of dawn came in through his window, and it took him the better part of the morning just to calm down from his nightmare. 

Once he felt composed enough to move, Kakashi slowly swung each of his legs over the side of the bed and sat there for a few more minutes to be sure he wouldn’t fall once he finally stood. He tested his weight on each of his legs before getting up and softly padding over to the bathroom, where he cleaned and dressed in record time. Eager to get out of his apartment, where his bed was the source of nightmares, Kakashi hopped out of his bedroom window and to the fire escape--going from his window he had a much more direct route to the cenotaph.

Kakashi began his morning ritual, then, walking among the streets of Konoha calmly and sedately so as not to attract attention. He didn’t want anyone to distract him from his destination, so he tried to avoid his comrades’ usual morning haunts and took the back paths. It took the majority of an hour, but soon Kakashi had reached the gates to the training grounds. He swung them open easily, like he had many times before, and walked the very familiar and worn path to the large rock that served as a memorial to all of the ninja that had fallen in service of their village. Kakashi stopped in front of that rock and brushed his fingertips across its surface, which was warm with the heat of the morning sun.

“You visited me again,” Kakashi muttered from beneath his mask. “I thought it was only fair that I returned the favor.”

Although, who was he really kidding? Kakashi visited his fallen friends every morning. He never failed to do so unless he was on a mission that took him away from the village. Some days, he would visit the memorial several times. It was on those days that Kakashi felt particularly guilty for not making a difference, for not keeping his promise or for just not keeping his friends in general. On days like that, he felt guilty for disregarding everything that his father had taught him about sacrifice and comrades.

That day, even though Kakashi knew he had obligations, he followed his typical routine and let the presence of the cenotaph calm him. Multiple times he would touch the engravings on the stone, searching for particular names, not all of which had been in his nightmare. He didn’t make any noise other than soft breathing, and he remained still the entire time. 

All of his comrades found it odd that Kakashi remembered the fallen in this manner. However, only Gai remained concerned, seeing it as unhealthy that his remembrance had turned into obsession. Kakashi assured Gai that nothing was wrong. He always accomplished what needed to be done, didn’t he? It was no one’s business how Kakashi decided to spend his free time. That excuse never went over well, however. Gai was persistent, but Kakashi could always deter him in the end: the taijutsu master always had a weakness for the sad and brokenhearted.

Sighing, Kakashi figured that it was probably best to leave the memorial. The sun was already on its slow descent to the horizon, and Kakashi had a new genin team to meet. With that in mind, Kakashi said his silent goodbyes and turned to walk the short way to the academy. Thankfully, the streets he took were all empty as Kakashi wound his way through the village. He supposed that anyone that walked those streets were probably all home, since the Academy had let out hours ago.

Kakashi tried to find it in him to be remorseful for keeping the new genin waiting, but he really couldn’t. Not even as he swung open the Academy’s gate and walked into the building did Kakashi feel repentant.

Sufficiently unperturbed, Kakashi Hatake padded along the corridor in much the manner as his ninken: slowly, lazily, and fluidly—the kind of walk that exuded carelessness. Truthfully, that’s how Kakashi always was. Even now, when he was hours late, Kakashi couldn’t find it within him to really care . Of course, he wasn’t oblivious to the fact that others might become irritated.

“Hehehehe,” sounded a mischievous laugh from around the bend in the corridor.

Kakashi’s ears pricked curiously at this sound as he slowed his already leisurely pace. He waited patiently for the next noise, but there really was no need.

“That’s what you get for being late, Sensei!” the same voice said again.

Now, Kakashi Hatake was very observant. You don’t become an elite jounin by completely disregarding the details around you . That being said, Kakashi could easily put together the clues around him and deduce that one of his future students was trying to pull a prank. Without much more thought, he could also conclude that the student in question was Naruto Uzumaki, who was known as being Konoha’s number one knucklehead. Even if Naruto wasn’t so infamous, Kakashi was sure he would have been able to identify him from the rest of his new team. An elite jounin never went into an assignment without the complete profiles of those he would be working with.

“Ugh,” sounded a different, feminine voice. “Just as long as I’m not involved!”

The name of Sakura Haruno immediately popped into Kakashi’s head: screechy, hyperactive girl with bright pink hair and a superiority complex. Oh, and she was clinically obsessed with one Sasuke Uchiha. Speaking of whom…

“Like any self-respecting jounin would fall for that,” said the pompous prodigy. “Cheh.”

Inwardly, Kakashi sighed. He had already decided that teaching three twelve year olds was going to be a hassle. And to make matters worse, he was assigned to the worst bunch that year, as per the Sandaime’s request. A group made out of a prankster, a boy-crazy girl, and an arrogant kid couldn’t possibly work out. Thankfully, Kakashi didn’t have any qualms about failing puppy-eyed twelve-year-olds. He had already done so countless times.

Eventually, Kakashi found himself at the door from which the voices of his new team were coming. With his hand on the door, Kakashi knew that he had two choices: he could either embarrass them all with an evasion jutsu or he could just not bother with it and let the eraser fall on his head when he slid the door open.

_Poof._

Kakashi went with the second option out of sheer laziness.

From beneath a fine layer of chalk dust, Kakashi bore witness to a guffawing Naruto, a pleading Sakura, and the disapproving glare of an Uchiha.

Between fits of laughter, Naruto Uzumaki exclaimed, “You fell for it, you fell for it!”

Shaking and holding her palms in front of her in a pleading gesture, Sakura Haruno beseeched, “I’m so sorry, Sensei, I tried to make him stop!”

“How can I put this?” Kakashi began when he felt that his students had enough fun at his expense. Besides, he was getting rather annoyed.

“Ah!” Kakashi smiled underneath his mask as if he had just come to a profound realization. He then leaned closer to his now-silent students. “I hate all of you.”

It was easy for the jounin to look at the unamused faces of the kids before him and not be affected. They were all nuisances, and the sooner he got rid of them, the better.


	2. ...as weak

_They are pitiful_ , Kakashi thought as he surveyed his new students.  The loudmouth was tied to a stump and the other two were sat beside him in the grass.  Naruto was furiously kicking his legs back and forth while his teammates seemed calmer.  Sasuke had his arms crossed and was looking to the side with a slight pout, but there was a certain gleam in his eye that indicated that he wasn’t as irritated as he let on.  Sakura to the right was grinning and clenching her fists to contain herself.  All of them were slightly shaking, as if they expected Kakashi to rip the good news right out from under them.

He wished that he could, but Kakashi knew that they didn’t deserve it like previous teams had.  Sure, they had failed the initial bell test, but in the end they banded together even after being intimidated by a far more skilled ninja.  Even the cynical Kakashi could not deny their potential.

Even if said potential was buried deep, deep, _deep_ under the surface.

Kakashi took a second to analyze each of his individual students to catalog the information away for later when he devised the course of action that would help them the most.

Sasuke was probably the least amount of work.  He had a dark past and an arrogance streak that would be hard to make him overcome, but he definitely had talent.  In the previous fight to get the bells, he displayed more technique and strategy than most genin.  However, he was far from perfect.  Too headstrong, too confident, and not quite enough strength to back it up.  Kakashi saw a lot of himself in that boy.

Naruto, on the other hand, seemed to be the complete opposite with no real talent.  He had simply charged at Kakashi without a thought.  Kakashi had a strange feeling that it would be hard to rein the poor boy in and be able to increase his strength as a ninja.  However, he also knew the power that sat waiting within the boy’s body and his genes.  Besides, the boy was definitely spirited and determined.  It would be a lot of work, but Kakashi hoped he could make a threat out of the boy one day.

That left Sakura, the worst off in the bunch.  Kakashi had read about her intelligence and chakra control in the files he found on his new team.  In a classroom setting, the girl was able to perform exceptionally.  But from the bell test, Kakashi knew that she couldn’t perform at all in the field.  She was too focused on Sasuke the entire time to even bother with getting the bells from Kakashi.  At least the others had made an attempt, but Sakura didn’t seem to have any determination other than the one to get her crush to notice her.

_They are weak,_ Kakashi thought as he motioned for the two, non-restrained members of his new team to follow him.  _And this is going to be a lot of work._ But he had no choice.  When face to face with the three brats that Hokage-sama had placed in his care, it was obvious that Kakashi was the only feasible sensei for such a team.

An Uchiha and a Jinchuuriki. Kakashi would rise to the challenge, though he knew he would probably suffer in the end.  His first team since his own genin days, and Kakashi couldn’t help but notice that they didn’t hold a candle on his old friends.

 


	3. ...as someone to protect

The mist covered the surrounding area in a thick blanket, moving languidly and producing thick smog.  Even with the sharingan, Kakashi couldn’t see through it past his fingertips.  When the Demon of the Mist came towards him, it would be too late to act if he relied solely on his sight.  He had to use each of his other senses perfectly if he was to take down the swordsman, Zabuza.  He let his chakra surge through him to try to pick up Zabuza’s movements and listened intently for a signal of attack.  On top of that, Kakashi was keeping close tabs on his students and the bridge builder.  The mist was made thicker by the tension and the focus in the air.

“ _There are eight choices_ ,” sounded the rough, gravelly voice of Zabuza.  “ _Which one should I take_?”

Kakashi strained his ears, but couldn’t pinpoint the source of the voice.  It seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere all at once, and even by expanding his chakra, Kakashi couldn’t identify the location.

“ _The liver?”_ sounded the disembodied voice once again.  “ _Lungs, spine, clavicle vein, neck, brain, kidneys, heart…”_

He knew.  That was what kept Kakashi from buying into it.  As a jounin, you had to identify fear tactics, and among them had to be the act of listing fatal points on the human body.  Kakashi concentrated on weeding out the _damn_ location of that voice instead of getting worked up over threats.

“ _Which one should I go after?_ ”

Kakashi had to further expand his chakra.  That was the only way to find Zabuza in the mist.  He hadn’t wanted to use so much chakra early on in the fight, but there was no other way.  It would alert Zabuza, but hopefully Kakashi could be quick enough in finding him to catch him off guard.

The moment he did it, he felt stillness in the air behind him, where his team was.  Frantically, Kakashi searched the area with his chakra to find the threat, but noticed that there was none.  _Of course,_ Kakashi thought.  _They’ve never witnessed something so intense_.

Both Naruto and Sakura were shaking, but their grips were firm on their kunai.  Sasuke, on the other hand, was paralyzed and the panic that rose from him in waves was infecting the air around him.  It was in that moment that Kakashi was overcome with a surge of compassion for his students.  They were just witnessing their first real battle, and it was his job to get them out of it alive.  He wouldn’t fail this time.

“Don’t worry, Sasuke,” Kakashi asserted firmly.  “I won’t let my comrades die.”

The passion in his voice was still echoing in the air when Zabuza made his move.  Kakashi could feel him building up his chakra to lunge at the group clustered around the bridge builder.  Immediately, Kakashi stepped into action and dashed towards the middle of the huddle.

“It’s over!” Zabuza roared.

There was a deafening _cling_ as Zabuza’s Executioner Blade met Kakashi’s kunai.


	4. ...potential

To say the least, Kakashi was impressed.  He wouldn’t go so far as to say he was floored, but it had to be pretty close.  To think that something so significant could come from his mismatched team was inconceivable. And yet, there it was right in front of the seasoned Jounin’s uncovered eye.

Naruto and Sasuke definitely had something in them.

It had been a couple nights since he had borne witness to their incredible display of teamwork against the legendary Zabuza, and Kakashi was overcome with an incredible urge to _teach_.  Kakashi had never felt more hopeful that they would succeed than in that moment.  When the water prison fell from around him, it became as clear as day.

Of course, they were still incredibly far from becoming experienced, talented shinobi.  However, Kakashi had absolute faith that they would be able to work together, just as they did in that fight with Zabuza, to help each other grow.  Granted, they weren’t going to be privy to that information. Kakashi planned on spurring them on through the guise of competition in order to help them improve. Naruto and Sasuke’s rivalry was a lot like the one between Kakashi and Obito in that way.  They worked fiercely to one up each other, never taking it upon themselves to notice that they were, in all actuality, _helping_ each other.  Nonetheless, Kakashi would use it to his advantage as a teacher.  He figured that had been Minato-sensei’s motive, all those years ago.

So there he stood, swaying upside-down from a tree branch and leaning heavily on his crutches.  He’d given the signal to begin, and now he just had to wait and see how long it would take.

He’d given them the task of walking up a tree using chakra control, something he’d noticed they both severely lacked.  Predictably, they had risen to the challenge and his eye followed their running paths to their respective trees.  Naruto and Sasuke were neck and neck right up until the moment that their feet hit bark.  Sasuke had kept running, but Naruto only managed a few steps from pure momentum before falling on his head.  Unfortunately, Sasuke didn’t get very far either before he was forced to flip off from the tree and skid to the ground.  Both boys were panting heavily and staring at their trees intently before a giggle sounded from somewhere above them.

“Hey! This is pretty easy,” said the shrill, girly voice.  The words quickly gained the attention from the boys, who jerked their heads up to a point to the far right of Kakashi.

There Sakura sat, the kunai Kakashi had thrown to her piercing the tree at a point near her head.  Her tongue was out, her cheeks were red, and her feet were swinging.  In the light that reached through the canopy of the trees, the sweat on Sakura’s face seemed to glow like a badge of honor. She looked absolutely ecstatic to be there, and Kakashi found that he was just as happy at her accomplishment. 

He’d never seen her potential before, but it became obvious in the waning afternoon light.  Even Naruto and Sasuke saw it, their faces becoming a mixture of shock and determination.  Naruto’s ever-readable face could even be described as awestruck.

Tactfully, Kakashi said, “It seems that Sakura is on the path to becoming Hokage.  Her skill rivals even that of an Uchiha.”

Sakura shouted indignantly from her perch in the tree canopy, but Kakashi paid her no mind as he witnessed the two boys steel themselves for another shot at the tree.  It seemed that his less-than-subtle jab at the boys really worked to spur them on.  Unfortunately, it didn’t have the same effect on Sakura.

As Naruto and Sasuke began their next attempt, Kakashi’s eyes wandered to find Sakura looking as forlorn as ever.  She was looking at Sasuke with a certain kind of disappointment that Kakashi could easily place:  the girl craved for her crush’s attention.

_No matter_ , Kakashi thought.  _She’ll be over it soon enough, but in the meantime she will inspire the boys to improve_.

She really did have nice chakra control.


	5. ...with true tears

Behind his mask, Kakashi was panting heavily.  Everything was quickly spiraling out of control, he surmised.  All of his senses were trained on fifty places at once.  At least half of which were focused on the enemy, but he was still more than focused enough to know what was happening around him.

Blood was dripping from him and falling in light _plops_ to the ground.

The boy, Haku, was lifeless some feet away due to Kakashi’s inability to stop the course of his Chidori.

Naruto was standing still, his head hung and facing away from the scene behind him.

Sasuke was there, in that place Naruto didn’t want to look.  Kakashi didn’t really want to look, either.

The bridge builder was looking, though, and standing above the scene with a sympathetic face.

Out of all of those scenes, the most gut-wrenching had to be the small girl crouching next to her teammate and sobbing into his shirt.  Her wails were loud and unrefined, her tears something he’d never seen her wear before.  These tears were not light, nor were they delicate.  They rolled in streams down her cheeks and marred her face with an angry puffiness.  No, Sakura Haruno was not sad.  She wasn’t rejected, angry, shocked, or disappointed.  The girl was absolutely heartbroken.

Her cries permeated the still air around them as the mist continued to dissipate.  They were so loud that Kakashi wished he could cover his ears, but he had no choice.  He had to take every little detail in if he was going to defeat Zabuza and save his remaining teammates.  The solemn bridge builder, the two lifeless bodies, and the mourning forms of his wards--each had to be accounted for; they were a part of the environment he was fighting in.  A shinobi must always be perfectly aware of his surroundings.  The guilt and depression could come later, Kakashi knew from experience.  Right then, the most important thing was to keep from failing anyone else.

_Shinobi rule number twenty-five_ , Kakashi thought as he recounted Sakura’s previous words.

And he lunged at the demon Zabuza.


	6. ...as capable

_They are no longer your students.  They are my soldiers._

He had been so confident saying those words to the fuming Iruka.  The sentiment came easily from Kakashi’s masked mouth.  His eyes were serious, and his posture straight for once.  Every shinobi in that room saw it, just as Kakashi had intended.  He could leave no doubt in the minds of his peers.

Team 7 was ready for the chunin exams.

He understood Iruka’s trepidations, but had to quash all semblances of uncertainty revolving around the room before he could even dare to hand the applications to his team.  Otherwise, they would have no chance of coming from the exams successful.

If the examiners, all of whom were in that room, doubted the rookies for even a second, it would all be over.  No one was going to pass someone that wasn’t a sure thing.  Only Kakashi was bold enough to do that.  So, by voicing his faith in his team, he had effectively instilled that same faith into his peers.

Now, rookies or not, Kakashi was sure that his team had a fair shot for chunin.  That is, if they decided to take it.

The exams were said to be different than last year, due to the new proctors that were hired.  Applicants had to enter as a three-person team if they were to participate.

That prospect wasn’t really a concern, in and of itself, but Kakashi still found that he had reservations about it.  If one of his students decided not to participate, then the entire team would be forced to sit out.

Of course, Naruto and Sasuke would be the first of all the chunin candidates the fill out their applications.  Each of them felt that they had something massive to prove, and being a chunin was a major milestone in that regard.  Kakashi didn’t have to give it a second thought; Naruto and Sasuke he could count on.

Sakura? Not so much.

It wasn’t that he didn’t believe in her.  It was that Kakashi knew that she couldn’t believe in herself.  She would be too nervous to enter the exam, and would surely feel insignificant if she were to try.  If she were to know that teams had to enter the exams as a whole, she would feel pressured to sign up.  She didn’t want to hold her teammates back, especially not Sasuke.

Kakashi felt that it was a waste for her to be so self-deprecating, but felt even more opposed to the fact that she might feel forced to be something she wasn’t.  He figured his best chances of having his entire team enter the exams confidently were to keep that silly requirement a secret.  That way, each of them would decide for themselves.

As he neared the meeting place, late as always, Kakashi began to think of something that Iruka said:

Were they capable?

Kakashi scratched his chin and slowed his already leisurely pace. It didn’t take very long for him to mentally give his answer.  _Yes, his team was capable_.  Naruto and Sasuke had the determination and even—dare he say it—the skill.  Sakura, on the other hand, would be fine if only she would believe that herself.  If she could overcome that, then all three of his green students might come out of the next few weeks with their own, equally green flak vests.

With a quick smile, Kakashi zeroed in on the meeting place and thumbed the three slips of paper in his pocket.


	7. ...as brave

The sharp, repulsive sound of kunai against flesh began to echo away as Kakashi stood panting.  His arms and legs were spread wide, feet planted firmly on the backs of the stadium seats.  Two bodies of Sound ninja were in front of him, but he paid them no mind.  Instead, he was focused on the air around him to try and sense what might be coming next.  Nearby, Gai was engaging in combat with a few other Sound ninja.  Trusting that his longtime rival had his back, Kakashi leaned forward to look through the arch his legs made.

“Don’t worry, Sakura,” he said with a small smile.  “Stay there for a bit and I’ll even the odds, hm?”

Taking a moment to observe his student, he saw that the girls arms were covering her head and that her entire form was shaking.  It saddened him to see one of his precious teammates that way, and it was even more upsetting to see said teammate under attack.

Kakashi glanced at the two corpses in front of him and decided that he had effectively dealt with said upset.

Without missing a beat, Kakashi leapt from his perch to take out a few more Sound.  He moved smoothly as the sounds of combat resounded throughout the arena and quickly pinpointed the location of Konoha’s Green Beast.  Once the coast was clear, Kakashi ran to stand back to back with his comrade.

“You’ve seen that barrier,” Gai said quickly.  “I’m concerned about Hokage-sama.”

While Kakashi understood the apprehension, he thought it was rather misplaced.  “The ANBU will handle it.  Besides, it _is_ the Hokage.”

Even as he said the words, Kakashi couldn’t help but notice that a massive amount of tension was coming from the roof where Orochimaru and the Sandaime were facing off.  However, he didn’t let it distract him.  He was still completely alert when he leapt away from Gai and attacked a few more of his enemies.  They didn’t fall easily, but swiftly.

Suddenly, Kakashi made a decision.  He’d been keeping tabs on all of the villagers during the fray, so it wasn’t difficult to locate Sakura once again.  She was still awake and trembling, and he realized that he would have to do something to change that if Sasuke was to be stopped.

“Sakura,” Kakashi demanded while his eyes were still surveying the area around him.  “I’ll need you to use your genjutsu talents right now.”

He felt and heard Sakura pick her head up hesitantly.  “Huh?” she murmured.

“You’ll have to release the genjutsu on Naruto and Shikamaru,” Kakashi explained.  “This will be your first mission in quite a while.  Naruto should be ecstatic.”

He had struggled to keep his voice comforting but firm, and it seemed that it had worked to increase Sakura’s confidence.  At least, she seemed less shaky when she questioned him.

“What kind of mission, Sensei?”

“Listen closely,” Kakashi ordered.  His face fell before the next words.  “This is going to be the first A-class mission since Wave.”

He’d expected her to gulp or whimper, and was surprised when he heard Sakura grit her teeth.  It wasn’t a sound of fear or nerves, but of determination. Unfortunately, her moment of bravery was interrupted as Kakashi deflected an attack and sent the offending Sound ninja flying over his teammate’s head.

“Sensei!” Sakura shrieked.  “A mission at a time like this?”

Kakashi risked a glance to see the Sakura was in complete disbelief.  He didn’t want her to become scared, so he directed his tense, serious expression at his bloodied kunai.  Without much hesitation, Kakashi slipped the sharp edge along his thumb.  “Sasuke left earlier to chase after Gaara.  You need to get Naruto and Shikamaru and track down Sasuke.”

An image of Gaara’s sand forming into a grotesque arm crossed Kakashi’s mind.

 _That strange chakra,_ he thought.  _What is it?_

“Then, shouldn’t I wake Ino and Choji and everyone for something like that?” Sakura’s teeth began to chatter.  “Surely, all of us…”

He noticed that Sakura was wavering, hurrying to place the insurmountable responsibility onto others.  It had to be corrected quickly.

“There’s most likely been an invasion from other Sand shinobi by now,” Kakashi explained smoothly to ensure that she would listen.  “With any more than four people, it would be difficult to stay hidden and move quickly.  You learned about that in the academy, didn’t you?”

The anxiety dissipated slightly.  “Yeah, but that’s only three…”

Before Sakura could finish, Kakashi bent down to press his bleeding palm onto the back of a sleeping villager.  With a burst of chakra and smoke, Pakkun had appeared in the middle of rubbing his eyes.  Sakura gave a start and an exclamation of surprise, but Kakashi wouldn’t let her think too long on it.

“Pakkun can use his nose to help you track Sasuke,” Kakashi explained.

“The-the fourth person is a-a dog?” Sakura stuttered with wide eyes.

Kakashi allowed the pug to pad over to Sakura and correct her in his deep, rumbly voice.  “Don’t call me a cute little doggy, missy.”

“Sakura, go,” Kakashi ordered without leaving room for argument.

He felt her slip from her seat and onto the ground without question.  Once he was sure that she was out of sight, Kakashi returned to the fray and weeded out a few more enemies.  Even as he fought, barely earning a scratch, he was aware of his student’s movements.

He heard many noises that hinted to him Sakura’s actions:  the brush of her clothes along the ground, the soft clap of her hands coming together in a seal, her sharp yet quiet exclamation of _Kai!_ , the prod of her fingers on Naruto’s jacket, the two teammates muttering, her knees skidding along the floor, and finally the angry chastisements directed at Shikamaru--who’d been awake the entire time.

So focused was he on Sakura’s movements and the enemy in front of him that he didn’t notice an enemy headed toward the three genin and a ninken.  He was only alerted to it upon the sharp cry from Sakura, and even then he had no time to reach them and deflect the attack.  There was a sickening lurch in his stomach.

At least until he heard Gai slam the enemy’s body through the wall behind the genin.

 _Just one more thing I owe him for_ , Kakashi thought as he flung the recently unconscious body of another ninja to his side.  He didn’t waste any time as he rushed to help Gai guard the area around the newly formed squad.

Kakashi’s eye roved the arena as he spoke.  “Listen, I’ll restate the mission one more time and then you’ll go.”

“Do you think they’ll be alright, Kakashi?” Gai asked softly so as not to discourage the others.

“They aren’t alone,” Kakashi reasoned.  “Pakkun’s with them.  If they don’t get in too deep, they’ll be fine.”

Truth be told, Kakashi knew it was a long shot.  They might be ready for chunin, but to give them an A-rank mission was a stretch.  Even as the three ripe genin fled through the hole Gai had made, there was a small sliver of doubt in Kakashi’s mind.  Sure, they would be safe.  They had Shikamaru to guide them and Pakkun to offer experience.  Sakura had succeeded in waking them, so it was left to Naruto to calm Sasuke down.  That would be a challenge by itself, and he hoped that it wouldn’t take too long.  They still had Gaara and that strange chakra to worry about.

If push came to shove, Pakkun would rush to warn Kakashi, and then he would go to help them.  He really wished it wouldn’t come to that point, but all he could do was put his faith in them.


	8. ...alone

Of course, it had to be coming.  The air was tighter, pressing harder against his mask during those days preceding Naruto’s departure with Jiraiya.  Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Sasuke was turning to the darkness for his answers.  It could have been that Naruto was placing the course of his training into someone else’s hands.  Either way, Kakashi felt so much guilt that it was stifling.

He wasn’t a teacher by any means.  He’d put all of his focus into Sasuke, seeing so much of himself in the boy that it became uncanny.  Even then, he couldn’t stop Sasuke from turning to Orochimaru.  The boy had been gone for months, and the guilt hadn’t lessened.  In fact, it grew as he watched Naruto heading away from Konoha, side by side with the other Sannin.  If only he had given more attention to Naruto and helped him grow; surely Naruto would have been able to stop Sasuke in that case.  He would have been strong enough.

The image of Naruto lying unconscious in the Valley of End with his face turned toward Sasuke’s abandoned headband… it never left Kakashi.

He was a terrible teacher.

“Sensei…” sounded a timid voice from beside the brooding Jounin.

Kakashi, his carefully schooled face devoid of any interest, glanced toward Sakura.  “Hm?” he asked idly.

The girl’s face had distorted into a quick look of displeasure before it was wiped away by her concern.  Her hand slowly retreated back to her side as she realized that Naruto was too far away to see her waving.  “Naruto…will be fine, won’t he?”

It wasn’t without doubt that Kakashi assured himself that genin couldn’t read minds.  There was no way that Sakura could have gathered that Kakashi was concerned; his face was blank and his slouch pronounced.  He’d perfected that stance and never had anyone--besides Gai--seen through it.

Regardless, with that short question, Sakura had inadvertently quelled Kakashi’s doubts.  Sure, he was a terrible teacher.  But Jiraiya had the Yondaime to act as proof to his own, superior teaching abilities.  If anyone would help make Naruto into the shinobi he had the potential to be, then it was Jiraiya.

“Right,” Kakashi affirmed.  “He’ll do well, Sakura.”

He was almost positive that the girl didn’t need the reassurance as much as he did, but she smiled anyway.  It was a sad smile, lonely and hesitant.  It was in that moment that Kakashi realized that he wasn’t the only one that had been left behind.

“We’ll meet in two days,” Kakashi said over his shoulder as he walked away.

“Huh?” Sakura turned, causing her sandals to scrape across the asphalt.

Kakashi lifted his gloved hand in a wave goodbye without looking back.  “You have medic training with Tsunade tomorrow, don’t you? So we can meet in two days.”

The smile was evident in the girl’s voice as she replied excitedly.  “Yeah! Two days!”

Maybe, judging from her enthusiasm, she read his thoughts again? He wasn’t just promising a meeting or training; that wouldn’t encourage such a bright response.  No, he was promising not to fail the only teammate he had left.  Thinking closely on it, Kakashi could tell it was almost selfish.  But he didn’t want to fail again.


	9. ...as a failure

_Two days is a long time_ , Kakashi concluded as he neared the sight of a pink head.  She was sitting in the grass, obscured by bushes and sunlight, when he found her in the training grounds.  She was always the punctual one, and he assumed that she had been there for hours waiting for him.

Languidly, Kakashi strode over to stand behind her.  His steps were silent, so she didn’t look up to greet him with the usual remarks about promptness.  He took that moment to look over her shoulder and found that she was just opening the cover of a medical textbook and that her shoulders were heaving with heavy breaths.

A jounin knew how to gather clues and put them together to arrive at a probable conclusion, so it was really no struggle for Kakashi to understand what was happening:  Sakura was just as late as he was.  There was no way that she would hold off on reading a book if she had arrived hours previously, like usual.  And she didn’t have the marks from training or warm ups, so the heavy breathing could only come from her rush to get to the training grounds before Kakashi.

A ball of dread began to form in Kakashi’s stomach even as he spoke to confirm his suspicions.

“How’s the book?” Kakashi asked as he leaned down to put his head next to her ear.

“AH!” Sakura started as her book flipped into the air and she scooted away.  Plucking the heavy text from the air, Kakashi watched as his student’s hand fluttered to her kunai holster.  _When did her reflexes get so quick?_

“You’re being jumpy today,” Kakashi observed in an indifferent tone.  _Damn it._

“And you’re not extremely late for once,” Sakura retorted as her hand scaled away from the holster.  “I guess we’re both acting unusual.”

Kakashi smiled with a squint of his eye, trying to appear unbothered.  The Sakura he knew was never late.  She didn’t have quick retorts, and her reflexes were even slower.  It wasn’t a good sign, at least not to Kakashi.  Two days was a really long time.

“I suppose you’re right,” Kakashi allowed.  “Maybe you should explain yourself?”

“Explain _myself?_ ” Sakura gasped.  “You’re the one that’s never on time; this was just a once in a lifetime occurrence for me!”

Kakashi’s smile faded in order to show her that he meant business.  “Even more of a reason for you to need an excuse.”

“That makes no sense,” Sakura sniffed.  However, it appeared that she was willing to consent after folding her arms.  “I was up training with Tsunade-sama all night so I overslept.  And now I have to finish this text for her before noon.”

Kakashi cocked his head as he looked down at her.  “She really lays it on thick, the Hokage, hm?”

Sakura shook her head to defend her new mentor before she spoke again.  “Although, that is what I wanted to talk to you about…”

_This doesn’t look good._

“What is it, Sakura?” Kakashi asked as if he knew all along.  Maybe he did.

“Well, I’ve been improving so much,” Sakura murmured nervously, but her smiled betrayed her true feelings.  “And Tsunade-sama has agreed to train me as her own apprentice!”

Kakashi’s stomach dropped, but his face lifted.  “That’s wonderful, Sakura.  I’m glad you’re improving.”

After hearing Kakashi’s subtle consent, Sakura’s face bloomed into a complete smile, devoid of any nerves.  “You’re okay with it? Really, Kakashi-sensei?”

Solemnly, Kakashi remarked that the title was no longer appropriate. And, really, had it ever been? “Of course.  Hokage-sama is a wonderful mentor for you.”

Sakura gushed her thanks before getting up and brushing herself off.  She was so excited when she reached for the book in Kakashi’s hands.  And then she was gone.

Kakashi realized two things.  One, he had managed to fail all of his students.  Two, he wouldn’t see any of them for a long time.

“Is that why you were so happy that I organized a meeting, Sakura?” Kakashi said softly to himself as he watched his most recent failure walk away.


	10. ...as a chunin

The window was cool even through the many layers of Kakashi’s uniform.  He was leaning against the large pane of glass behind the Hokage’s desk and looking at the street below.  Excluding Tsunade’s irritated remarks as she stood beside him and observed her village, it was a relaxing situation.  The last mission was a hard one, and he hadn’t been in the village for all of ten minutes before Tsunade demanded his report.  The cool window was the only respite he had at that moment.

He had previously tuned out the grumblings of his Hokage as they observed the villagers, but it was short lived as two events struck him at once.  One was Tsunade’s voice and the other was the sight approaching from down the street.

“Speak of the devil…” Tsunade mused.

Sakura’s unmistakable mass of short, pink hair had appeared from around the corner, and she was quickly nearing the street directly below the Hokage’s window.  All around her were various members of what some villagers had started to call the Konoha 11.  Kakashi didn’t need to look closely to see that Sakura’s smile threatened to tear her cheeks and that her steps were exceptionally light.

“Damn girl is flaunting that new, ugly vest everywhere,” Tsunade complained.  “After two years of trying to make her take the damn exam, and suddenly she’s happy about it.”

Hearing the Hokage’s words, Kakashi’s eyes trailed to examine his ex-student’s brand new attire.  Sakura was brushing her fingers along the shoulders and pockets in an almost motherly way, and her friends beside her were acting as proud as she was.  If he thought on it, Kakashi could remember the day he became a Chunin, too.

“Two years?” Kakashi asked with a glance toward Tsunade.  “The Chunin exam has been up and running again for three years.”

Tsunade frowned as she explained, “It took a year to reinstate the exams, since everyone was apprehensive after the invasion.  I thought that’s what made Sakura not want to take it when it was finally available, so I let it slide.  Memories can be an awful thing.”

Kakashi nodded imperceptibly, knowing only too well the truth of that statement.  “What was the real reason?”

“I only found that out when the second exam that she refused to partake in came around,” Tsunade sighed.  “I was furious.  I asked if she didn’t have confidence in my training, if she was scared, all kinds of things.  I told her that there was no excuse, and do you know what she said?”

Tsunade and Kakashi locked eyes.

“She said she wanted to wait for the rest of her team,” Tsunade scoffed.  After a quick shake of her head, she turned back toward the window, Kakashi following suit.

“Speaking of which,” Kakashi continued, desperately groping for that chance to change the subject.  “Have you heard from Jiraiya?”

Tsunade groaned, making Kakashi regret his question immediately.  “That man!  He only reports in _after_ the deadlines I’ve set up, and even then it’s about inconsequential things.  He sneaks in two or three important, Akatsuki-related sentences at the end, though, the bastard.”

Kakashi chuckled drily.  “And Naruto?”

“He’s improving,” Tsunade said, still slightly irritated.  “Exponentially, according to Jiraiya, though he never goes into many details.”

Kakashi felt a shiver of dread as Tsunade glared at him.  His own scant mission report was sitting on the desk behind them.

Thankfully, the moment passed once they both saw a glimpse of pink on the street right below the office window.  Sakura and her group had finally made it to the tower and the girl was waving to her shishou and her old sensei.

Kakashi smiled softly and indulged her with a small salute before she carried on her way, a skip in her step.  Tsunade’s lip quirked into a smirk reluctantly as her apprentice danced away.

“The vest fits her nicely,” the Hokage remarked.

Kakashi nodded his assent.  “You did well, Hokage-sama.”

“So did she.”

Absently, Kakashi wondered what finally prompted the girl to take the exam.


	11. ...as an equal

Training Grounds 3.  It seemed that all of Team 7’s most monumental moments happened in that place.  Kakashi didn’t know if it was like that for other teams, but for his team it absolutely was.  It was already evident in the way that Naruto and Sakura were looking around the place.  It was the first day that Kakashi had seen either of his old students since a little over five years prior.  That fact alone made their meeting at Training Grounds 3 significant.

And if it hadn’t been already, Kakashi’s previous words would have made it so.

_“From now on, the two of you will join me on team missions.  It will be different this time around; we are no longer teacher and pupil, we are equal Konoha shinobi.”_

And how true it was.

Naruto had just come back from his journey with Jiraiya that morning, and already he was showing great maturity.  His personality quirks were the same, but Kakashi noticed a different way about him.  He was eager to find out how his skills had improved.

And Sakura… well, he could already guess how much stronger she got judging by the beating she gave Naruto earlier.  The kunoichi’s moods were still unpredictable and always in extremes, but she also had a different manner in the way she presented herself.  Both Jiraiya and Kakashi had commended her beauty—although Jiraiya was less tactful.

Truly happy that half of his team was finally back, Kakashi decided that he would test both of their skills.  There was still so much he had to learn about his newly matured teammates.  They were no longer green genin, but fully fledged ninja.

The bells jingled on Kakashi’s belt, prompting him to begin his speech.

“I’m sure you remember the rules,” Kakashi said with his eyes on his precious new book, courtesy of Naruto.  “Your goal is to get the bells from me in whatever way you can.  You have until dawn.”

“I’ve missed this place,” Naruto said softly, not really paying attention to Kakashi’s words.

Sakura nodded.  “Yeah…the old days.”

“Ah,” Kakashi hummed, only slightly annoyed by the inattention of his teammates.  “This is where the team first trained.  Sasuke was around then, too.”

Really, he’d just meant to reminisce the way that they were.  But it appeared that Naruto and Sakura hadn’t come to accept Sasuke’s absence the way that Kakashi had learned to.  Instead, the both of them turned their heads away to sulk in silence.  Regardless, Kakashi had to rectify it if they were to get on with the Second Bell Test.

Kakashi snapped his new _Icha Icha_ shut.  “I suppose we should begin.”

Almost immediately, and predicatably, there was a change in demeanor.  Naruto and Sakura were adjusting their gear and wearing the most determined expressions that he’d ever seen on them.

“No book, Kaka-sensei?” Naruto teased with a tightening of his headband.

“Have you finished it already?” Sakura joined in.

Kakashi smiled at seeing his team back to normal, but it faded quickly in the atmosphere surrounding an impending battle.  “Not yet, I think I’ll save it for later.  Besides, I have a feeling that I should take things more seriously now.”

Naruto and Sakura widened both their eyes and their smiles when they saw that Kakashi had lifted his headband to reveal the Sharingan.

 _Good_ , he thought.  _They’re eager._

Eager was definitely the word to describe it.  No sooner had Kakashi’s hand dropped to his side than did Naruto lunge at him with a barrage of kunai and shuriken.  In that moment, it seemed to Kakashi that Naruto hadn’t changed a bit.

Kakashi deflected the weapons with a few of his own, throwing extra to aim directly at Naruto.  Caught off guard and still in midair from dodging the previous kunai, the younger boy executed a quick Kage Bunshin to throw him out of the path of Kakashi’s weapons.

There wasn’t the time to give Naruto’s cleverness much thought as Naruto skidded out of harm’s way and onto the dusty ground.  The boy didn’t hesitate as he transformed his clone into a fuma shuriken and prepared to hurl it straight at Kakashi.

Easily enough, Kakashi appeared behind Naruto with the body flicker technique and wrapped his fingers around the arm that held the massive shuriken.  After he had stilled, Kakashi remarked that he really wasn’t as surprised as he ought to be to see that Naruto had a shadow clone come up behind him with a kunai pointed at his back.

“Still the first to jump, Naruto,” Kakashi said.

Naruto only laughed.

Thinking back on the First Bell Test, Kakashi remembered how Naruto had barged straight at him, tactless and weak.  The Naruto both in front of and behind Kakashi was a far cry from the one he knew six years prior.

With a kind smile, Kakashi said, “Alright, start!”

And then he disappeared.

It was dark where he reappeared under the earth.  With a combination of earth-style and the body flicker, Kakashi had immersed himself underground.  He knew that his old students wouldn’t have figured it out, but the teenagers in front of him were quite different.  It was only a matter of time before Kakashi was either found or attacked.

 _Or both_ , he thought glumly as the earth crumbled around him and light began to shine through the cracks in the stone.  A horrible rumble—something that reminded Kakashi of his recurrent nightmares—made its way to Kakashi’s ears and it still echoed there as the dust and stone settled, revealing Kakashi’s hiding place to his ex-students.

Shocked at both the speed and force that was used to find him, Kakashi looked up to see that his assailant had been none other than Sakura.  It almost scared Kakashi to see the kind of power that the Godaime had bestowed upon her student.  Even Sakura’s stance was monster-like as she grinned triumphantly with her gloved fist aimed at the recently shattered ground.

“Got you!” she exclaimed proudly.

 _Both of them_ , Kakashi thought as he made his escape.  _If they both have matured this much, then I’ll need to retreat to think of a plan._

It chagrinned Kakashi the jounin to admit that he had to retreat for much younger shinobi.  However, Kakashi the ex-sensei was absolutely thrilled to see the progress they had made.  Even when they used that dirty trick hours later—no doubt, Naruto had come up with the idea to try and spoil Kakashi’s _Icha Icha_ —he remained thrilled.  True, he was defeated.  But he was defeated by admirable shinobi.  They were no longer part of the ragtag group he first met. 

 _We are equal Konoha shinobi_.

How true those words rang.


	12. ...master

His bed was the source of nightmares, so why was he clutching it like it was his only savoir? He was plopped face down, nose buried deep in his lumpy pillow, which was stained yellow from age. His toes hung off the edge of his bed, but the rest of his body was firmly placed on the mattress and his fingers were threaded in the threadbare sheets. Kakashi didn’t even dare to move, not even a clenched eyelid, from his position. He found it too risky, too laborious to even attempt. It was difficult to breathe since he hadn’t pulled down his mask yet, but it was equally difficult to try and fix it.

Kakashi focused on making quick, shallow breaths so that his aching ribs and burning lungs could both have some semblance of peace.

A man of his distinction should not have been in such a pitiable state, he supposed. With his current position, he probably looked like a dead man. The blood had soaked the sheets underneath him—he could feel the warmth and stickiness on his abdomen—and his breaths were too small to be noticeable. Most likely, his hair was in a state of disarray that resembled a bird’s nest— _a rather greasy bird’s nest—_ and the expanse of his pale skin was covered with a sheen of sweat.  Of course, he couldn’t tell because his face was in a very uncomfortable, very smelly pillow. It smelled like iron and body odor and mildew.

This was the great Copy Nin, _the_ Hatake Kakashi, a distinguished shinobi of Konoha, former ANBU captain, pupil of the Yondaime, and currently a fully-active Jounin in bingo books across the world. And he was slobbering all over an old pillow.

It had been a few hours since he had sent Pakkun for help—reluctantly, since he knew he would be chastised for it—and even longer since he had first made it to his apartment and collapsed on the bed. A few days earlier, he had just started heading home from a very dangerous and very _successful_ mission in Kiri. A few days and a few minutes earlier, Kakashi had received the injury that left him in such a pathetic state on his bed.

The source of nightmares. His savior.

It was then, when his thoughts had come full circle, that Kakashi heard the tiny _poof_ of Pakkun’s return and the following clicks of his nails on the hard floor.  The clicks got louder as the pug reached the edge of Kakashi’s bed and then disappeared altogether when he jumped up next to Kakashi’s head, on the smelly, yellow pillow.

“The boss lady is upset, you know,” Pakkun said in his gravelly voice.

Kakashi grunted into his pillow.

And then, true to the pug’s word, Kakashi’s front door slammed open and against the other wall with a deafening _bang._ Thudding footsteps shook the foundation of the apartment complex and got even louder as they neared Kakashi, who was appropriately frozen in fear. Tsunade, judging by the amount of noise, was angry and hungover.

“Hatake!” bellowed the Hokage as she entered his room and stopped next to his bed. Kakashi’s ears rang. Pakkun promptly jumped from the bed and ran out to the kitchen to scavenge some _grub_ , as he hastily put it.

Kakashi tried to elicit a cheerful greeting, but his pillow muffled the sound.

“You reckless bastard,” Tsunade grumbled through gritted teeth as she very ruthlessly shoved him onto his back and ripped down his mask. “One would think, after all these years, that a Jounin could show a little _respect_ for his Hokage!”

“My apologies, Tsunade-sama,” Kakashi murmured through a meek smile. “It appears that I’ve gotten myself a scratch.”

Tsunade snorted, “Scratch, Jiraiya’s perverted old ass. You’ve got a gash from the left axillary region all the way to your right hypochondriac— _lift your arm—_ what did you do? Twist to get away from the enemy when he had a goddamn katana out? Too close were you? Miscalculating because of _exhaustion_?”

“It was a cat.” Kakashi blinked.

Tsunade stabbed him with a glare, her hand pausing on its way to cut away his clothing with a pair of scissors.

“A big cat.”

“Lift your damn arm, Hatake,” Tsunade growled as she got her medic pack from where she had dropped it beside the bed. She swiftly retrieved gauze and antiseptic before replacing it with the scissors she had been using, and which were now dotted with blood and moisture.

Kakashi complied with a bright, eye-crinkling smile.

_“The other one, you cheeky fool.”_

With a gulp that burned his dry throat, Kakashi obeyed. “Yes, Hokage-sama.”

Tsunade gave an exasperated sigh as she proceeded to clean his festering wound.  “It smells like a morgue in here, Hatake, a hospital morgue.”

“Mmm,” Kakashi hummed. “Just like the hospital, you say?”

Tsunade’s expression grew even grimmer while she rummaged in her bag. As she pulled out a suture kit, Tsunade’s teeth grit together audibly. “I put a lot of work into that hospital, Hatake. It would do you some good to take advantage of it!”

To deal with the sensation of tugging on his torn skin, Kakashi closed his eyes. “I don’t like the decor.”

“It’s worse in here,” Tsunade argued.

“It must be the touchy-feely nurses,” Kakashi countered.

“Says the old man with a penchant for that other old man’s smut.”

“The invasive procedures?”

“The only invasive procedure you’ll be having,” Tsunade began, “Is my fist down your throat.”

Clicking his tongue against his cheek, Kakashi said, “That seems a little counterproductive to the healing process, Tsunade-sama.”

“You know what else is a little counterproductive?” Tsunade muttered absently as she put away the suture kit and readjusted her gloves. “Being reckless with your own life and electing to suffer blood loss rather than go to a nice, comfy hospital where you’ll be catered to and brought back to your best, most beneficial state to Konoha _as a dutiful shinobi_.”

Kakashi opened his eyes and Tsunade placed her cool, gloved hands on his abdomen and pumped her hot chakra into him. It itched and burned as it went through his pathways, like a mosquito bite or a bee sting. But he knew she was fixing his torn muscles, and so he tolerated it like one might undergo the discomfort that comes with not being allowed to scratch chickenpox.

The two lapsed into silence at that point, as the mood sobered and the fire dissipated from the Hokage’s eyes. It wasn’t until Tsunade finished patching him up and was tidying all of her medic supplies that Kakashi decided to speak up.

“How many people have been treated at your hospital, Hokage-sama?”

Tsunade pursed her lips as she snapped off her latex gloves and threw them into the overflowing wastebasket in the corner of the room. “You know it’s too many to count, Kakashi.”

Feeling much more comfort in using his muscles, Kakashi swung his legs over the side of the bed and rested his elbows on his knees.  There, in his familiar slouch, Kakashi looked into his esteemed Hokage’s narrowed, amber eyes with one of his own.   “How many have come out?”

“Not enough,” Tsunade admitted regretfully. Her expression immediately softened with remembrance for those she couldn’t save. She walked across the room in only a few strides and pulled out Kakashi’s desk chair, plopping onto it with her arms crossed over her ample bosom.

Kakashi nodded and looked back to the floor.  “With all due respect, Hokage-sama, I prefer to place my life on the line out in the field, where I stand a fighting chance and I can protect my precious people. In your illustrious hospital, I am helpless. That is your battlefield, not mine. In there, I’m no longer a shinobi.”

_And if I’m not a shinobi, what am I?_

Tsunade tilted an eyebrow. “You’re being talkative, Hatake. I’m not sure I like it.”

“Forgive me Tsunade-sama,” Kakashi smiled with a small flash of teeth as he stood up. “I’m merely astounded by your superb medical treatment.”

“I understand why you boys and girls do it, Kakashi,” Tsunade said softly in juxtaposition to her rough voice. “Believe me, I do. But you need to understand that us medic-nin are there to help you. Just like your comrades in the field, we have your back. We’re not trying to take control from you; we’re returning it.”

Kakashi reached into his drawers and took out a jounin-issued sweater before he replied, “I understand.”

Tsunade sighed and got up from the chair with a pop in her spine. “No, you don’t. But hopefully you _will_ understand _this_.”

Kakashi turned around, mask pooling around his neck, and raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“That twerp took the Chunin exam for _you_ ,” Tsunade said firmly. “Sakura had been working with me for a while, at that point, and she knows all about your aversion to the hospital.”

The Godaime liked to believe it was sheepishness she saw when Kakashi looked at the ground in front of her, not boredom.

“That girl, your former student,” Tsunade continued ruthlessly, “has been so wrought with worry every time you go on a mission, so much so that she doesn’t leave my side until she knows you’re back. She sticks around like a goddamn fly until I show her your mission report and tell her that you’re alright. She took the exam she was so terrified of just to get _that much_ closer to being allowed out on the field with you again, where she could keep you safe.”

“That’s enough, Hokage-sama,” Kakashi whispered. “That’s enough.”

“I don’t think you _understand_ ,” Tsunade hissed. “You might not care about taking risks with your own health because of some screwed up association with the death of your teammates and hospitals, of all places, but other people _do._ That poor girl is privy to too much information as my apprentice, some of it even your jaded ass would shiver at, but the one thing that really worries her is the fact that you don’t care enough to keep yourself alive.”

Each of the Hokage’s words was steel, glinting in the sunlight that filtered through Kakashi’s window and piercing through him with a blunt edge. Progressively towards the end of her speech, the words got closer together and more venomous. It left Kakashi disturbingly still, his eyes and face blank as he stared back at his Hokage and she studied him with her molten glare. He didn’t know what to say, to think, about worrying his former student. Sakura always had been the emotionally-invested one, even more so than Obi—Naruto. She was teamed with Naruto. He supposed it was only natural for her to worry after him, even after all these years, but he never knew the extent to which Team Min— _Team 7_ had damaged her.

“I’m off to tell that girl that your sorry ass is fine and to stop camping out in my office to drool on my paperwork,” Tsunade said as a dismissal, even though it was Kakashi’s home. “And you’re going to promise me that you and that Naruto kid won’t worry her anymore—consider it an order. It disrupts her training.”

Kakashi nodded. One never went against direct orders from their Hokage.

As Tsunade spun around to walk out the door, Kakashi stopped her with a cough. It was impulse that caused him to do this, and he hesitated before finally going through with what he wanted to say. Tsunade raised an eyebrow.

“Hokage-sama,” Kakashi began. “I recommend Sakura for Jounin.”

“That’s bold of you, Hatake,” Tsunade remarked dubiously. “But don’t you think it’s a bit too early? She only just made Chunin.”

“Not now,” Kakashi shook his head.  “When she gets restless to rise up the ranks, I will formally recommend her under one condition.”

“I’m listening,” Tsunade drawled.

“No one else can recommend her,” Kakashi declared as he pulled up his mask. “She can’t enter the evaluation until she passes one of my tests.”

“And what brings this on?” Tsunade challenged.  “You know it won’t help your case.”

“What case?” Kakashi said innocently with an ingratiating smile.  “Just please accept my recommendation.”

Tsunade eyed him from his head to his toes and back up again.  “Deal.”

And the Godaime went out the way she came.

Pakkun peeked around the doorway to Kakashi’s room. “I like her.”

 _Which one?_ Kakashi wondered, but he was too busy gathering his sheets and cleaning up blood.


	13. ...as the thread

It was the next day that Kakashi told Naruto about the promise. Due to the Hokage’s exemplary healing abilities, Kakashi was feeling as good as new the morning that he was supposed to meet Naruto and Sakura for training. Anyone who knew him, however, knew that no degree of health would make the Copy Nin punctual. Two hours later than the time Team 7 had agreed upon to meet at the training grounds, Kakashi arrived to wave at his disgruntled teammates.

“Good morning,” Kakashi hummed happily as his hand returned to his pocket. “Shall we get started?”

Naruto and Sakura looked at each other from their places leaning against a large tree. With an eye roll and puffed up cheeks, the boy pushed off from the tree with his foot and started walking toward Kakashi.  Once he came closer, Kakashi could see that Naruto was already sweating and had dirt staining his orange clothes.

“We already started, Kaka-sensei,” Naruto huffed. “You’re _late_.”

Kakashi grinned sheepishly and pulled a hand out of his pocket to rub the back of his neck. One would think the boy wouldn’t be so angry, considering the fact that Kakashi was always predictable in his tardiness. “Sorry, Naruto. I got lost—“

“ _On the path of life_ ,” deadpanned his two former students in unison.

Sakura sighed then and gently pushed off from the tree in the same manner as Naruto. She made her way over to the two men and then crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. “Look, Kakashi-sensei. I have to be with Tsunade soon to learn a new medical procedure, and I’d really like to study beforehand. You two can go have fun beating each other up, but leave me out of it.”

The smile was still present in Kakashi’s lone eye, but Naruto was pouting and begging Sakura not to leave.

“Please, Sakura-chan! We only sparred a little bit and now Kaka-sensei is finally here! Can’t you tell Baachan to wait a _tiny_ bit longer?” Naruto begged, crocodile tears in full prominence.

Never one to fall for a guilt trip, Sakura smacked Naruto on the back of the head. “Baka! I’m just gonna be sitting over there reading! You know I can’t leave you two alone to kill each other.”

As a grand gesture, Sakura swung her arm around to point at the base of a tree with lots of uncovered and twisting roots. Both Naruto and Kakashi followed the direction with their eyes, promptly nodding and then approaching each other to start sparring.

“ _Boys_ ,” Sakura scoffed and then started to make her way to the tree she had indicated. Then, loud enough to be heard over the increasing amounts of testosterone, she yelled out, “Try to make it quick! Unlike some people, I actually have respect for times that were previously agreed upon.”

“Yeah, yeah, Sakura-chan,” Naruto muttered as he rolled back his shoulder to loosen it.  “Don’t worry, this won’t be long, will it, old man?”

There was a distinct _pop_ as Kakashi cracked his neck, “I’m sure it won’t.”

Upon finishing his sentence, the wind around the training grounds picked up speed and blew the hair away from Sakura’s face— _reckless,_ she thought—and whipped the pages of her medical texts around.  Kakashi and Naruto had begun to face off, instigating the abrupt breeze with their swift movements. In true Kyuubi-vessel fashion, Naruto had immediately swung at his old sensei with a right hook.  Before the spar had even begun, Kakashi had predicted this and developed a plan, which he carried out in full.

Skidding back across the ground to escape Naruto’s wide, powerful swing, Kakashi began to make the seals for a fireball jutsu—it was never wise to remain on the defensive when dealing with Uzumaki Naruto. The younger boy pulled his arm back for another punch that would stop the seals, but Kakashi was too quick.  Almost as if they had been there all along, Kakashi had his fingers in a circle around his mouth and was breathing out a large ball of flame that singed Naruto’s sleeves along with the tips of the grass. Dirt was exposed as Naruto dug his heels in to stop from skidding back, but he wasted no time in reaching for his kunai to send a barrage towards Kakashi. The kunai were easily deflected with the help of Kakashi’s keen eye, and then the Jounin took the offensive.

It went like that for a while, the back and forth between who had control of the sparring match. Most of the time, Kakashi was pressing on, but Naruto would get a lucky hit every now and again to turn the tables. However, Naruto lacked the certain _purpose_ behind his fists that his opponent had. Not only was Kakashi trying to gain the upper hand in the sparring match, but he was also trying to tire out Naruto as much as possible in order to make him quiet when the fight was finally declared _over._ As it stood, with fists and weapons and jutsu flying, Naruto’s cries of either triumph or irritability where deafening in Training Grounds Three. Emotions were always present in the jinchuuriki’s fighting style, and they displayed themselves through various grunts and exclamations. In fact, Naruto was _always_ incredibly boisterous. It took every effort that Kakashi had in order to subdue the boy, and that was saying a lot considering the Jounin’s own considerable stamina.

Eventually, however, Kakashi believed that he had managed to exhaust Naruto enough for him to speak in a normal decibel. It was at this point that Kakashi caught one of Naruto’s punches and grabbed the elbow that followed to throw the boy over his shoulder and onto the ground. A sharp gasp escaped Naruto, but he lay passively on his back. Figuring that the spar was finally over, Kakashi plopped down to lie beside Naruto and began to put his efforts to the test.

“Naruto,” Kakashi began simply. “Hokage-sama has given us orders that I hope you will follow to the best of your ability.”

Naruto turned his head to study Kakashi, but the older man’s face was pointed at the sky. The entire left half of his face was covered by his hitai-ate and mask, giving Naruto no indication of the other man’s mood. The Copy Nin was stoic on and off the battlefield, so Naruto had no luck trying to figure out the seriousness of what he was about to say.

“Baachan? What does she want?” Naruto asked softly.  Kakashi took this as indication that his efforts had been put to good use.  He had been successful in making sure Sakura would not hear their discussion—she would only get angry.

“How often does Sakura heal you?” Kakashi evaded, never moving his head to face Naruto.

All of his facial features scrunched up before Naruto replied, “I request her in the hospital after missions and then she heals me after training. Why?”

At this, Kakashi finally turned his head to look straight at Naruto. It was just as he thought; Sakura was relentless in her worry for her teammates.  “Tsunade-sama has ordered that we try to take better care of ourselves so that we don’t make Sakura sick with worry.”

The direct eye contact with Kakashi’s lone, coal-black eye impressed upon Naruto that this issue was serious. Despite being oblivious to most details, Naruto _had_ noticed Sakura’s pressing concern for his health.  She always got a weird face when she was working on him, and Naruto didn’t like it.

“I’ll start requesting other medics,” Naruto resolved.  Kakashi nodded approvingly.

Just then, as Naruto’s words were still dissipating in the air, the grass rustled above the heads of the two comrades.  Simultaneously, the two looked up to find Sakura looking down at them with her hands on her hips. They tried to pacify her undoubtedly rising temper with smiles, but she shook her head, having none of it.

“Need help up?” Sakura asked of the two men, but they were already standing and brushing themselves off.

“No need,” Kakashi said as he pulled out _Icha Icha Tactics_ with a flourish of his wrist.  “Well, I’ll be seeing you two tomorrow for training.”

Naruto was just about to say _don’t be late_ , despite the hopelessness of it all, but Sakura’s voice drowned him out.

“Sensei,” Sakura began softly. “You’re all bruised up.  Let me make sure both of you are okay before you leave.”

Both shocked by her tenderness and ashamed of their knack for worrying their teammate, Kakashi and Naruto shared a fleeting look. Then, they simultaneously began to speak, giving out excuses as to where they had to be besides _there_.  However, they were promptly shut up and sat cross-legged next to each other on the ground. A sharp glare from Sakura was all it took. Perhaps her worry for them was a concern, but her anger at them was deadly.

“You first, Naruto,” Sakura said pleasantly, in contrast to her previously dark expression. She kneeled next to the boy and placed her hands on his shoulders to examine him with her chakra.  The initial intrusion caused Naruto to shiver, but only for a moment until he got used to the sensation. Scrapes and bruises along Naruto’s skin began to disappear almost immediately after Sakura’s fingers made contact with his shoulders, but Sakura didn’t appear to be exerting any large amount of effort.  In contrast, Naruto had his face pinched together and was incredibly stiff.  It seemed that Kakashi’s talk with him had really taken, and Kakashi easily pegged Naruto’s body language as _guilty._ It was regretful, but with time it would be better for all of them, especially Sakura.  This fleeting moment of guilt would be forgotten once Naruto and Kakashi saw Sakura worry less.

Almost as soon as it had begun, Sakura had finished with Naruto’s treatment and was waving him away— _go get lunch, you’re fine_ —and had transferred her gaze to Kakashi, who was trying to look suitably indifferent with his book in hand.  True to her no-nonsense nature, Sakura flicked the book away from him and scooted closer to kneel in the grass at his side.

“Lay down,” she ordered with steel in her usually bright, green eyes. Her voice felt like a blood pressure cuff.

“Sure, Sakura-chan,” Kakashi chirped as he lowered himself onto his back. Usually, a woman telling him to lie down would seem erotic, but Kakashi had never been more terrified of such a small, brightly-colored female in all of his life.

 _Click._ A tongue against her cheek and Sakura was reaching into the medic pouch that was situated on her waist.  “How was your mission, Sensei? You just got back, didn’t you?”

Having the foresight to see where this was going, Kakashi decided to deflect the question by bringing her attention to something else. “Why didn’t Naruto have to lie down? Am I your favorite, Sakura-chan?”

A glare hit Kakashi’s face before Sakura ignored him in favor of pushing his headband back and flashing a small light in his eyes.  Like a true shinobi, Kakashi squinted and tried to turn his head away, but Sakura’s right hand held his head firmly in place.

“Don’t be a baby, Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura admonished, but she was putting the Flashlight of a Thousand Suns back into her pouch. “Now tell me why you insisted on training today when you really should be recovering from your mission. I was hoping you would never show up.”

 _There it is_ , Kakashi thought. He tried to push himself up from the ground, but Sakura’s hands were there to push him back down with all of her strength.

“Ow, Sakura-chan,” Kakashi murmured pathetically.

“Don’t pretend, Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura hissed as she lifted his Jounin sweater a few inches up his abdomen. When she continued to press her chakra-laden hands on his newly-exposed skin, her touch was unexpectedly gentle. After her harsh words, her chakra was warm and comforting, like swallowing a gulp of freshly-brewed tea and feeling its calming warmth as it sank to your gut and outward.

“Sorry, Sakura,” Kakashi slurred in his chakra-induced stupor. It was like sinking into a hot spring with steam rising all around in dancing tendrils.

“Apologize to Tsunade-shishou,” Sakura insisted, though her tone was getting gentler as she noticed that Kakashi was finally submitting to her treatment.  “I’m sure you’re going against her orders by training so soon after she treated you.”

Privately, Kakashi remarked that he was, indeed, going against orders.

“I have another mission in a few days, Sakura,” Kakashi murmured.  “I wouldn’t have had much rest, anyway.”

Abruptly, Sakura pulled her hands away and stopped the steady stream of chakra, leaving Kakashi cold and able to stand up.  He held out a hand to her and she took it to help herself rise as well. She was shaking.

“You have another mission?” Sakura said incredulously. “Already?”

Kakashi realized, a little belatedly, that he was breaking his promise to the Hokage, and it hadn’t even been a full twenty-four hours.  “I’m a shinobi, Sakura. It’s nothing I can’t handle.”

Their clothes brushed against each other as Sakura began to walk away.  “I’m late for my training with Tsunade-shishou. I’ll see you tomorrow, and then you’re gonna take it easy. Even if I have to pin Naruto down.”

“Yes, Sakura-chan,” Kakashi said pleasantly. And he watched her leave Training Grounds Three.

Contemplation wasn’t really Kakashi’s forte, but sometimes he was prone to vulnerable moments where something would trigger reason for extensive thought. Sakura leaving the training grounds, following the same path that Naruto had taken, had triggered that. Never before had Sakura occupied his thoughts so much, not even when she was under his care as Sensei. But noticing how much concern she had for him and for Naruto, it was obvious to Kakashi that she was the one constant in Team 7. Even when Sasuke pulled away, straining against the bonds of the team for power and revenge, when Naruto tested their connection by going on his journey of self-discovery and strength with Jiraiya, or when Kakashi neglected his responsibilities as team leader by taking mission after mission to forget the feeling of his team disappearing around him, Sakura was there.  Sakura had stayed in Konoha, getting stronger and finding her place in the home of Team 7. She never left, never made herself scarce. She was always there to heal Naruto and Kakashi, to support Naruto in his quest to bring Sasuke back. Like a mother, Sakura pestered them to take better care of themselves and always took the responsible role.

Kakashi wondered if it really was _so_ bad to let her worry over them. Sakura, by showing her concern for her team, was the thread that held the dysfunctional family together.


	14. ...as strong

Naruto’s tired form was leaning against Kakashi.  The Akatsuki, Deidara, had disappeared, but Naruto was weakened and shaking from having become the Kyuubi and being sealed so quickly after.  The slip of paper was still against Naruto’s forehead at that point, as Kakashi couldn’t be bothered to take it off.

 _To have planned for a seal,_ Kakashi thought as he looked around and tried to locate the enemy before it was too late.  _What did you see, Jiraiya?_

He’d never faced an Akatsuki like that before, and Kakashi found that it was taking a toll on him.  The Kamui was far more tiring in battle than he had anticipated.  It took most of his strength to just kneel there beside Naruto, so he was surprised when he saw Sakura and Chiyo appear beside him.  It wasn’t that he thought Sakura incapable, but leaving her to fight against an Akatsuki with only Lady Chiyo didn’t bode well with him.  If he was having so much trouble after facing Deidara, then he could only wonder at what Sakura had faced in that cave with Sasori.

But she appeared to be fine.  She was scratched and dirty, and there was a massive gash in her shirt where a sword had gone through.  Her gloves were worn and frayed and she was panting and sweating.  Chiyo was much the same.  She had cuts and scrapes and looked worn overall, although she appeared much more tired than Sakura.

“Finally,” Sakura huffed.  “We caught up.”

In the light that reached through the canopy of the trees, the sweat on Sakura’s face seemed to glow like a badge of honor.  With Lady Chiyo there, leaning on her arm, Kakashi had never seen Sakura look stronger.

He had absolute faith that Sasori was taken care of.

“You found this place well,” Kakashi remarked while still keeping tabs on his surroundings for Deidara.

“We saw where the enemy was flying before,” Sakura answered with a quick glance around the clearing.

Lady Chiyo seemed to make the same assumption that Sakura’s face was suggesting.  In her weak, hoarse voice, she said, “It seems…you are still having trouble here.”

“Sakura-chan, you guys did it,” Naruto breathed out as the seal fluttered from his forehead.

Lady Chiyo hummed.  “Yes, but what of Gaara?”

Kakashi looked at Naruto to see his reaction and found that he was wearing a solemn expression.

“I see,” Lady Chiyo murmured.  “All right…”

The clearing had lapsed into silence with the weight of the circumstances, and Kakashi didn’t waste the moment.  He strained to listen for any sign of Deidara, not daring to search with his chakra.  However, there was no need as an unexpected voice cut through the clearing.

“Nice, Neji!” the exuberant voice of Maito Gai said from somewhere behind the foliage.

After that, everything happened in quick succession.  Deidara was drawn out of the brush, trying to escape the onslaught from Team Gai.  He ended up right in front of where Kakashi was kneeling with the rest of Team 7 and Lady Chiyo.  Kakashi rushed to warn Gai and the others of Deidara’s fighting style:  _explosions, long range_.  At that moment, Deidara began to chew and gulp some of his leftover clay.  It distorted his body rapidly, making him balloon and increase in size almost as if he was a sponge soaking in water.  Neji yelled something along the lines of _get out of the way_ , but Kakashi knew there was no time.  Deidara was expanding and sooner or later he was going to burst.  In the end, he did.  There was a massive explosion of bright energy and light and there was no way any of them were going to escape.

Then it was gone and Kakashi stood clutching his left eye in the silence.

 _I made it in time_ , Kakashi remarked with relief.  The battle with the Akatsuki was over.

“Kakashi-sensei!” yelled one of Naruto’s shadow clones before leaping down from a tree and supporting Kakashi’s tired form.

“What did you do?” Sakura murmured, awestruck.

Kakashi looked at her with only his normal eye open and his chest heaving.  “I sent him and the explosion to a different dimension.  Is everyone alright?”

He noted the shock in Sakura’s face but didn’t dwell on it too much before two of Naruto’s shadow clones jumped from their perch on a tree branch to land behind them.  Suspended in between them was the unconscious form of Gaara.

“Sakura-chan,” Naruto pleaded.

And another battle began.


	15. ...as a problem

Genma Shiranui liked to plant ridiculous ideas into Kakashi’s head.  Ever since they were genin, Genma’s team (consisting of Ebisu and Gai) had been rivals of Kakashi’s team.  When Kakashi became the sole remaining member of Team Minato, the rivalry had ended in most ways.  Gai still carried his own personal rivalry with Kakashi while Ebisu all but forgot the childish competition.  Genma, on the other hand, had adapted the contention into something milder.  Genma’s challenges were always one-sided, unlike those that Kakashi had grown accustomed to with Gai.  Instead of physical or mental prowess, Kakashi’s patience was tested when Genma decided to relive the childhood competition.

“Think I could pick up one of your nurses?” Genma asked absently as he looked out the window of Kakashi’s small hospital room.

If he had more strength and less dignity, Kakashi would have raked his hands down his face.  Genma had been saying inappropriate comments the whole morning, and Kakashi was woe to admit that he didn’t have the ability to move, let alone escape.  All he could do was reply as patiently as possible, hoping that Genma would grow bored and leave him alone.

“How should I know?” Kakashi remarked blandly, his voice without infliction.

Unfortunately for Kakashi, Genma’s eyes seemed to zero in on his friend’s clenched fists.  Cheerily, Genma continued with his torture.  “Aw, come on.  Have some faith, friend.  I know that these women usually go for the brooding, injured type, but you shouldn’t doubt me.”

Kakashi closed his eyes to try and block out the sound of Genma’s voice.

“Granted, all of the nurses so far have been more focused on you, but I think I could change that,” Genma mused as he tapped his senbon between his teeth. “I can be brooding when the situation calls for it.”

Kakashi briefly contemplated removing his IV and using the body flicker in order to get away from his old friend, but quickly dismissed the idea.  He’d made a promise to Tsunade.

“Hey!” Genma exclaimed as he pushed from the wall he was leaning against.  “Let’s make a bet, Kakashi, for old times’ sake.  If I can get the next nurse’s number, you owe me a drink.  And if you win…”

Kakashi didn’t allow Genma to finish thinking about the logistics of the bet, which Kakashi planned on taking no part in whatsoever.  The sick man’s finger was already firmly pressed against the call button next to his bed.  He didn’t let up, even as Genma made his way closer to Kakashi’s bed and questioned him.

Even as he pressed the button, Kakashi wondered if it was worth it in order to get rid of Genma.  Yes, a nurse would burst into the room and Genma would flirt with her shamelessly.  If he succeeded, he would further pursue the new object of his affection.  Or, more likely, Genma would fail and proceed to sulk.  Either way, Kakashi would be left blissfully alone.  If he was forced to stay in the hospital, then at least Genma wouldn’t be there to irritate him.

On the other hand, Kakashi would most likely have to endure prodding from a nurse as Genma worked his so called magic.

Kakashi figured that the ends justified the means as the door to his room creaked open following a soft knock.  Slowly, Kakashi released the call button as his and Genma’s attention were drawn to the feminine hand on the doorframe.  It was at that moment that Genma seemed to catch up to what was happening.

“You sly dog,” Genma murmured with a slap to Kakashi’s shoulder.  “Trying to cash in on the bet early.”

Well, at least Genma seemed to pick up on the fact that Kakashi had been calling for a nurse for Genma, not for himself.  Kakashi supposed it wasn’t such a loss if Genma’s feelings were spared from knowing that he only wanted to be alone.

The plan really was turning out to be perfect.  That is, until Kakashi saw the woman behind the door.

“I know for damn sure that you didn’t need assistance so badly that you had to lay on the button for a minute straight,” Sakura grumbled as the door swung open to reveal her in full mission gear.  There was a slight sheen on her skin as she breathed heavily, and Kakashi took that as a sign that she was furious.

Kakashi’s face turned white under his mask, but Genma didn’t miss a beat.

“Sakura!” Kakashi’s personal pest exclaimed brightly.  “It’s a pleasure to see you.”

To Genma’s chagrin, Sakura didn’t pay the romantic any attention.  She merely strode over to Kakashi’s ever-shrinking form with heavy, angry steps and even heavier, angrier eyes.

“Do you have any idea how hard the nurses work?” Sakura admonished with her hands on her hips.  “And then your sorry ass has to go and bother them with that incessant little buzz? Do you even know what that thing _sounds_ like?”

Realizing that the situation was quickly spiraling out of control, Kakashi aimed to conduct damage control.  “Relax, Sakura, I didn’t mean to cause any trouble.”

Unfortunately for him, Sakura only seemed to get angrier.  “ _Relax?_ Is that what you want me to do? I come in here to check on you before my mission, out of the kindness of my heart, only to find that you’re making the nurses panic with that damn button?”

Kakashi noted that as Sakura’s voice began to make each of her sentences a question, her face became as red as her shirt.  Judging by his open mouth and limp senbon, it seemed that Genma had noticed it as well.

“These nurses don’t know you as well as I do!” Sakura continued without losing her fire.  “They thought you were in serious trouble.  Thankfully, I got here in time to assure them that you were fine and that I would check on your sorry ass _personally_.  It’s really not a good idea to work up the people that are keeping you healthy!”

“You said something about a mission?” Kakashi said hesitantly, trying to divert Sakura from the source of her anger.

Genma abruptly closed his mouth, securing the senbon, and turned to look at Kakashi with awe.  It appeared that Sakura was calming down.  Her face was quickly lightening to its normal, pale shade.

“Yeah,” Sakura huffed as her hands began to glow with chakra.  “The substitute Team 7 has been assigned a mission.”

Kakashi allowed a brief moment of relief before replying.  “Tsunade-sama told me something about that.  You’ll be investigating that lead you found on the Akatsuki during your fight with Sasori, right?”

Spreading her hands out on Kakashi’s chest, Sakura responded, “Yes, but I’m kind of nervous.  Sai, our new teammate, doesn’t really get along with Naruto.  He’s so…strange.  He kind of reminds me of Sasuke.”

Kakashi hummed as he felt Sakura’s chakra spread out and check his vitals.  “Sasuke, huh? In that case, I wouldn’t put too much stock in him getting along with Naruto.”

Sakura snorted.  At that moment, Genma had leaned back against the wall with a contemplative expression that only earned a quick glance from both Kakashi and Sakura.

“What about your new captain, hm?” Kakashi questioned as Sakura’s hands moved farther up his chest.  “What do you think about him?”

“Oh, Yamato-taichou?” Sakura said distractedly.  “I’m not sure about him yet, but he seems qualified enough.  Tsunade-shishou appointed him, so I trust her decision.”

It was very vague, but Kakashi was able to pick up on the hidden meaning to Sakura’s words. Yes, Yamato had been appointed by Tsunade-sama, but Sai was appointed by no other than Danzo. Kakashi was well aware of the power struggle between the Hokage and the ANBU-ROOT leader, and it seemed that Sakura was privy to that information as well. She must have known that Tsunade and Danzo differed in their opinions of whether or not Naruto should be allowed on missions. Sai and Yamato had been assigned to the team in order to keep him in check, as was the deal with the Elders. With all the drama, Kakashi felt the need to offer Sakura a bit of comfort. She seemed uncomfortable to speak of the situation aloud, even though Genma had high security clearance and Kakashi’s was even higher.

“He’s very skilled,” Kakashi reassured her with a pat on her glowing hand.  His fingertips didn’t leave her skin, only traveled to rest on her wrist. He hoped that she understood he was saying more than his words suggested.

In his peripheral vision, Kakashi saw Genma narrow his eyes.

Sakura smiled softly, and her words suddenly lost their double meaning.  “I’m sure that he won’t be able to compare to you, Kakashi-sensei.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” Kakashi sighed.  _After all,_ he thought.  _I’m the one in the hospital._

“We’ll see after the mission,” Sakura decided.  Her chakra disappeared as she withdrew her hands from Kakashi’s form, leaving Kakashi’s hand to flop back down on his abdomen.  “But I really should get going, Sensei.  I only had an hour before departure, and I already spent most of that time with Tsunade-shishou.”

Kakashi nodded absently.  “Sure, sure.  Go keep your comrades safe.”

As Kakashi spoke, Sakura took a step back to examine the room.  When her eyes landed on Genma, she frowned and stepped forward to flick the senbon from his mouth.  _No ninja tools in the hospital_ or something like that.

“You make the role of a medic sound so honorable,” Sakura deadpanned before walking toward the door.  “Anyway, your recovery is as expected.  Just don’t worry the nurses anymore, Sensei.  And please listen to your medics while you stay here, okay?

“Yes, Sakura,” Kakashi said as he crinkled his eye and saluted with his right hand, the one that she had abandoned.  “Good luck on your mission.”

With a smile over her shoulder, Sakura was out the door and gone.

Which left Kakashi alone with his initial annoyance.

“What was that all about?” Genma questioned with a suspicious look from his position on the wall.

“Sakura gets worked up when she thinks I put myself in danger,” Kakashi explained objectively as he examined his right hand.  “Apparently, worrying the nurses falls into that category.”

“Well you ruined any of my chances in picking her up,” Genma huffed.  “Was this how you planned on winning the bet?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Kakashi said with a blink in Genma’s direction.

“Please!” Genma exclaimed as he crossed his arms.  “You took all of her attention so that I couldn’t even talk to her.”

“You’re being ridiculous, Genma,” Kakashi said plainly.  “She was angry; you wouldn’t have been able to speak with her anyway.  Besides, she wasn’t a nurse, so she doesn’t fall under the bet.”

Kakashi was really starting to get annoyed with the way that Genma was speaking.

“Say what you want.” Genma shook his head.  “But she was completely focused on you, and you definitely didn’t do anything to stop it.”

“What are you getting at?” Kakashi demanded.  Genma had a terrible habit of beating around the bush.  “This can’t just be about the bet.”

“You call yourself a jounin and you can’t even see it?” Genma laughed.  “That girl is a problem.”

Kakashi stared at his friend blankly.  He really didn’t like playing dumb, but in this case Kakashi thought it to be the best course of action.  At least, it was the most plausible way to get Genma to leave.

“Seriously?” Genma trilled.  “A young, pretty girl comes to check up on you _personally_ and you don’t see any problem with that?”

Truthfully, Kakashi saw many problems with that.  Sakura was too young, too inexperienced to be worrying over an old jounin like him.  Jaded as he was, didn’t deserve the attentions of a girl like her.  He used to be her sensei, and up until recently he was her captain and teammate.  He would continue as team leader after his recovery.  He’d been in ANBU before she had even picked up her first kunai. There was no need, no merit, for Sakura to be worrying over a jaded, experienced man such as Kakashi. It would only make her sick. Kakashi was more than capable, and Sakura had no authority to doubt his abilities in that respect. There were all kinds of problems with Sakura giving so much of her attention and time to Kakashi. It was for that reason that Kakashi had promised Tsunade to take his health more seriously. 

He supposed that wasn’t exactly what Genma was getting at.

Genma was a perpetual romantic.  Most of his peers saw him as a shameless womanizer, but in truth he was just a serial romancer.  All of his previous relationships ended quickly due to the fact that Genma usually went after kunoichi with no desire to settle down.  Because of this, Genma probably thought that Kakashi should accept Sakura’s attentions in a specific way.  To Genma, Sakura was most likely the type of problem that needed to be worked out _romantically_.  In that sense, her attention wasn’t really as much of an issue as what Kakashi was willing to do with it.  In Genma’s opinion, Kakashi needed to work on garnering _more_ attention from Sakura.

“What?” Kakashi asked blandly.

Genma scoffed.  “Fine, Kakashi, act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.  But when it comes back to bite you in the ass, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“Bye, Genma,” Kakashi said to Genma’s back as it went through the door.  The moment he’d been waiting for had finally approached, and all Kakashi could think about was how he wished he could follow his friend out of the hospital.

If he hadn’t used Kamui during the fight with Deidara, then Kakashi wouldn’t have landed himself in the hospital. As luck would have it, that was all hindsight.  He couldn’t even escape the hospital as he normally would because of that ridiculous promise he made to Tsunade.  Kakashi wasn’t allowed to make Sakura stress about his health.  He had to be a good shinobi and sit in his hospital bed like the nurses told him or else risk worrying his teammate.  Granted, it was a good cause, but Kakashi was still irritated.

On top of that, Genma just had to go and ruin the peace that was Kakashi’s only solace in that miserable room.  He’d planted those silly ideas about Sakura in his mind, and they wouldn’t come out.  Kakashi knew that Sakura was giving him perhaps _too much_ attention and consideration for an ordinary teammate.  It wasn’t quite romantic, but definitely misplaced.  Sakura was a lovely girl, but what other reason would there be for her to stop in to check on her former sensei?  She was always a pedant for punctuality, and going out of her way to look in on Kakashi before a mission definitely didn’t follow her self-imposed rules.

Sighing, Kakashi tried to ignore the notions that Genma had plagued his mind with.  Sakura might have been nurturing an unhealthy obsession of checking up on Kakashi’s condition.  She knew that Kakashi was injured, often, and worried for her teammate.  Surely, that would warrant the visit, especially since she was going on a long mission and wouldn’t be privy to information regarding his recovery.

 _Sure,_ Kakashi thought.  _And I’m not worrying about her either_.

Because like it or not, Sakura and Naruto were going on a mission to investigate _the_ Akatsuki with two shinobi that Kakashi wasn’t all too familiar with.  And there was nothing he could do about it.


	16. ...as an adult

It was nice. Really, if Kakashi thought about it for a while, he knew that being able to see his team and his longtime friends was great.  To be able to see Team 7 after their long, back-to-back missions and meet the elusive Sai was a privilege after having been in the hospital for such a while.  What were the bruises on Sai’s and Naruto’s cheeks about anyway? Sakura wasn’t much help in that regard, though he suspected her fist was about the same size as the marks on her teammates.  Nonetheless, it was great to see them.

But he was just _really_ happy when they finally left.  Claustrophobia did not become him.

Team 10 had even stopped by his hospital room, most likely under some pretense.  Asuma had stayed longer than the rest, saying that he had some information.  However, Kurenai came not even a minute later and took Asuma away.

Kakashi was left hanging.  His only look into some of the more exciting happenings—that were occurring without him, mind—had quickly been snatched away by a pretty woman.  It was a shame.  While Asuma didn’t seem very happy about the news he had to share, Kakashi was willing to know _anything_ as long as it provided some action.

The hospital was going to be the end of him, Kakashi knew it.

Resolute in his fate, Kakashi had settled back in his hospital cot to continue reading as soon as he was alone again.  A few nurses had come to check in on him throughout the afternoon and even into the early evening.  Those visits were the only occurrences to break up the monotony of hospital life, and even then Kakashi couldn’t enjoy it.  What was there to enjoy about being jostled about and measured with medical tools? His stay was doing nothing to change his perception of hospitals.

However, he supposed he had to hand it to the nurses.  They really were unpredictable with their dozens of check-ups and check-ins.  As he heard the soft footsteps leading up to a sharp tap on his door, Kakashi was surprised.  Why would a nurse be bothering him so late at night? The moon was prominent in the sky already, and Kakashi was sure most of the night shift was already asleep in the lobby and locker rooms.

Kakashi hummed softly to tell his late-night visitor that he was up and looked expectantly at the door to watch it open.  Slowly, the door creaked to reveal the silhouette of a petite woman standing hesitantly in the doorway.

“Sensei?” the woman said.  “May I come in?”

He was surprised to see his teammate there so late, but he quickly brushed the feeling off as he saw her serious face.  “Visiting hours are over, Sakura.  I thought you knew that.”

Sufficiently unperturbed, Sakura stepped further his room and let the door click softly behind her.  She was hesitant in walking any closer to him, if the tenseness of her shoulders was anything to go by.  However, she didn’t waste any time in chastising him.  “You shouldn’t be reading in the dark, Kakashi-sensei.  You’ll ruin your eyes.”

“Last time I checked, moonlight was rather bright,” Kakashi deadpanned with a glance toward the open window and the light that filtered in.

Sakura shook her head and frowned before taking a timid step closer.  “What did Asuma-sensei have to say?”

“Someone’s being a bit nosy,” Kakashi joked flatly.  “I thought I taught you better than that.”

Sakura scoffed— _fine—_ before finally making the rest of the journey to stand next to Kakashi’s bed.  It seemed to him that she was just searching for his permission to stay, and that she had found it somehow by Kakashi’s sarcasm.

“How was the barbeque with the others?” Kakashi asked conversationally, though his eyes were back on his book.  “I hope you didn’t cause too much trouble.”

“Sai is the one you should worry about,” Sakura grumbled.  Kakashi lifted an eyebrow, but didn’t inquire any further as he detected a sense of bitterness in her tone.  It wasn’t wise to poke the medic when she was angry.

Smoothly, the pair had lapsed into silence for a few moments.  Kakashi wasn’t bothered by it, since he had _Paradise_ to entertain him.  However, Sakura was getting rather fidgety next to him and kept glancing at the monitor next to him, probably analyzing all of his vitals.

“Sakura.” Kakashi glanced up at her with a hooded eye.  “Just get on with it.”

His teammate gave a sigh of relief and quickly began to channel chakra into her palms.  Kakashi braced himself for the intrusion of her chakra and was relieved when it finally came.  _The anticipation is the only bad part_ , Kakashi thought as he glanced at Sakura’s palms on his chest.  Sure, the initial feeling of someone else’s chakra entering him was strange, but Sakura quickly replaced it with warmth.  None of the other medics he met in the past had such dexterity and skill when it came to maneuvering their chakra along his pathways, not even Tsunade-sama.

Speaking of which, Kakashi was slightly miffed about the fact that Sakura was still worrying over him.  She had just stopped by earlier that day and he was fine, so why did she insist on checking him personally? Tsunade was going to have his head.

However, Kakashi was not too bothered to take advantage of the chance he had.  Sakura’s hands were glowing rather nicely, and Kakashi had always enjoyed soft reading light.

“Do you _really_ have to use _my_ chakra to read that dirty smut?” Sakura snapped, though her chakra still remained warm and soothing and constant.

“I’d hate to ruin my eyes by reading in the dark,” Kakashi responded cheekily with a quick smile.

Sakura shook her head and clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth before tactfully changing the subject. “Sorry for coming so late.  Dinner ran a little bit longer than I thought and I didn’t want to embarrass you by doing this with everyone else watching.”

“Embarrass little old me? Impossible,” Kakashi’s eyes softened at Sakura’s thoughtfulness.  It really was worthless for her to worry over someone like him.  He should put a stop to it…

But he couldn’t say anything because Sakura didn’t really leave enough room for conversation.

“I mean, not that you don’t _deserve_ it, but Naruto probably wouldn’t let it go that our big, bad sensei had to be treated for a booboo,” Sakura snickered softly before moving her glowing palms to his abdomen.

Kakashi’s eye drooped, but he didn’t have time to defend his own honor.

“It’s ridiculous, really,” Sakura continued.  “You’ve been discharged for much _more_ and now you’re hospitalized because you’ve exhausted yourself? I guess you’re getting pretty old, neh, Kakashi-sensei?”

Something was wrong, Kakashi quickly surmised.  Her fists were beginning to lose their soft glow as they clenched in the fabric of his shirt.

“You know, years can change a person,” Sakura said bitterly.  “It’s not too far of a stretch to say that you’re different than you were a few years ago, Sensei.  I think your years might have finally caught up to you.”

“Sakura,” Kakashi warned.  She was quickly spiraling into something that he couldn’t see, and the light surrounding her hands was flaring much like the flame of a candle.  So intense at moments that the warmth of her chakra felt more like a burn, and then so soft and weak that he had to suppress a shiver.  Sakura always had impeccable chakra control.

Something was wrong.

Sakura ignored his warning and issued one of her own, “You should be careful, now.  Shinobi like you don’t usually have so much time.  One day you’re going to leave Konoha and find some sort of sick adventure that takes you away forever.  It’s only a matter of time before _that_ mission.”

Oh, Kakashi knew.  He most definitely knew, better than _her_ at least, about _that_ mission.  Sakura was still a girl; she hadn’t seen nearly as much proof of mortality as he had.  So why did she find it necessary to tell him all of this? Was she trying to scare him into taking better care of his self? Because Tsunade had already tried that tactic.

No, this was something else, the real purpose of her visit.

“Sakura.”

“Do you have any idea how many of those missions I’ve seen?” she pressed.

Kakashi was officially stunned into silence.  Was he really right in saying that she hadn’t seen as much mortality as him? Kakashi tossed his book onto the chair next to the window and sat up further to study Sakura.  Where was all of this coming from?

Sakura’s eyes were trained on the dim light coming from her hands.  Kakashi couldn’t even feel the sensation of her chakra anymore, it was so weak.  He had a sneaking suspicion that Sakura was only trying to avoid his gaze.

She continued her twisted speech.  “I mean, I’m at the hospital almost every day.  And I’ve had my fair share of missions without you, too, Sensei.  Sometimes I see people that just don’t come home.

“Sometimes people just don’t come home.”

And that was when Kakashi felt the first tear splash against him.  It had pooled in the corner of Sakura’s right eye around the time that her chakra had completely dissipated, leaving only the moonlight to illuminate the small hospital room.  From there, it had dribbled down her cheek and from her chin, until it landed right in between her fingers and onto Kakashi’s abdomen.

“Sakura.”

And then the sobs came, more tears pouring from her face and soaking Kakashi’s shirt with their little impacts.  Her fingers had quickly tangled themselves in the damp cloth as she squeezed her eyes shut and bared her teeth.  Her shoulders were quaking with every raking breath and Kakashi found himself at a loss of what to do.  When was the last time Kakashi had seen her cry? It had to have been when she was clutching Lady Chiyo to her chest in Wind, the soft dainty cries of remorse and sorrow.  But _this._ What was Kakashi supposed to do with _this?_

The last time he had seen her cry like this was when Sasuke was lying, presumably dead, on that bridge in Wave.  She was screaming then, clutching the shirt of her teammate much like she was doing to Kakashi now.  She was heartbroken, thinking that she had lost Sasuke.

 _Oh_ , Kakashi thought.  _Sasuke._

But there were differences, too.  In wave, Sakura had cried and screamed without restraint.  She thought that she had lost the love of her life, and was sobbing because what would she do without him? Those tears were selfish and childish. Those tears were not light, nor were they delicate.  They rolled in streams down her cheeks and marred her face with an angry puffiness.  No, Sakura Haruno was not sad in Wave.  She wasn’t rejected, angry, shocked, or disappointed.  The girl was absolutely distraught.

But here, in Kakashi’s hospital room, her sobs held a sense of refinement, as if she was keeping herself in check.  She was mindful of the hospital’s other inhabitants, never letting her sobs reach too high of a decibel. Her face was red and patchy, yes, but distorted in such a way as if she was angry with herself for allowing a moment of weakness.  And the reason for those tears seemed very different from in Wave, as well.  Her speech earlier didn’t seem selfish in the least, nor had it seemed immature.  Sakura had spoken with sophistication and wisdom far beyond her years.  Her sobs seemed to do the same.

Sakura was an adult.

And with that, Kakashi knew exactly what to do.  He sat up and disentangled her hands from his shirt, holding onto her limp wrists to assure her that he wasn’t just dismissing her.  Gently, He pulled on her wrists to get her to turn towards him, but she remained stubborn and kept her face to the side.  He had to let go of one of her hands then, let it fall onto the bed beside him.  Once his right hand was free, Kakashi lifted it to grab Sakura’s chin and turn it to make her look at him.

“Sakura,” Kakashi said to get her attention. Tentatively, her bloodshot eyes opened.  “I once promised you that everything would go back to normal.”

She sniffed loudly.  “I remember…”

“I’m very sorry for that,” Kakashi murmured.  “It doesn’t seem that easy, does it?”

“It never did, not even when you first said it,” Sakura shook her head in a way that was almost imperceptible.  “He’s so different now, Sensei, and Naruto still has so much faith.”

“And you?” Kakashi asked.  
“I want to hate him,” Sakura croaked.  “For everything that he’s done to Naruto, I mean.  But I just can’t.  We’re running out of time before Orochimaru has his way.”

Kakashi smiled reassuringly at her.  “The hero always arrives at the last minute.”

At that, Sakura began to laugh.  It was a harsh sound, out of place in the quiet of the hospital room and the gravitas of the situation.  But Kakashi was grateful.

“I never thought you would quote Naruto, Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura joked meekly.

“Sometimes he’s very right,” Kakashi explained before drawing away from her and reclining back into the hospital bed.  “Seriously, you won’t tell him I said that, will you?”

Sakura allowed a small smile and pat his hand before stepping back.  “No promises.  But I might be able to get you out of here tomorrow.”

At that, Kakashi perked up.

And Sakura was drifting away towards the door, and Kakashi realized that he forgot something.

“Sakura,” Kakashi whispered, causing his teammate’s hand to pause on the doorknob.  “I mean it.  We’ll get to him in time.”

Sakura didn’t turn around, but spoke loud enough for him to hear.  “Thank you, Sensei. But I’ve stopped putting so much faith into promises.”

And left.


End file.
